The Danger Zone

Summary of the Danger Zone on the Hot Crazy Matrix

Danger Zone Summary

Nobody hopes to find themself in a treacherous situation, but all too often an unfortunate series of events leads unsuspecting men and women into relationships with people out of the Danger Zone. While Danger Zoners are often attractive people on the surface, experience shows that relationships with them are destined to fail. Read on to learn about what makes these beings so dangerous, as well as how to avoid getting too close.

People in the danger zone are defined by two key features: 1. their physical attractiveness (or hotness), which is always above a 5, and 2. the fact that they are are always more crazy than they are hot. It may not be apparent at first that someone is crazier than hot - many people who are crazy are also good at hiding it. We also tend to give the benefit of the doubt to attractive people, rightfully or not. Regardless, once it becomes apparent that you are dealing with someone who is more crazy than attractive, you know they are in the danger zone, and far from the marriage zone. It is then safe to abandon any notion of a successful future with this person, unless you too believe you are in the Danger Zone, in which case, you may enjoy this situation.

You've been warned of the dangers in these waters. Swim at your own risk.

Danger Zone Facts:

Hot Rating:

> 5

Crazy Rating:

> Hot

Unfortunately Common

Early data suggests that approximately 15% of the world's people are danger zone inhabitants. This means you're equally likely to meet a Danger Zoner as you are to meet someone out of the Marriage Zone. Proceed with caution.

More Information about the Danger Zone

Key Traits

  • Physically attractive and often seductive
  • Unpredictable; volitile
  • Mysterious; unique; intriguing

Known Danger Zoners

Miley Cyrus

Whether or not the image that gossip magazines have painted of Miley is accurate or not, it is a great demonstration of what the Danger Zone is like. She is absolutely attractive on a physical level, but the party-life, unpredictable behavior, and provacative attire are a combination that most men would not want to bring home to mom.

Tom Cruise

Most women agree - Tom Cruise is an attractive man. However, most people of any gender would agree that a screw or two have come loose in Tommy's head. Adding the rumors of Cruise's personal oddities/unusually excitable nature added to his high, but not too high, hot factor forms a clear picture of a Danger Zone citizen.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: How can I tell if someone is crazier than they are hot as quickly as possible?

A:Because craziness takes many forms, there is no one-size-fits-all tactic to identifying how crazy a subject is. However, there are several rules of thumb that can help you spot crazy before you're in too deep.

1. Be skeptical of the hot: A sad truth that scientists have come to find, is that when someone is very, very hot, there is a high likelihood that they are quite crazy. So even though many attractive people aren't (too) crazy, it's best to keep your gaurd up and to stay alert for any additional signals when dealing with the hottest of the hot.

2. Watch our for lying: It may be a small fib about where they bought their shoes or whether they saw they used to watch that old TV show. These may seem small, but if you catch someone in a lie like this, trivial or not, it could be representative of a larger problem. Are they lying because they're hiding something? because they like to lie for fun? Regardless, take note, avoid calling attention to the inconsistency. Agitating people who are truly Danger Zoners can have unpredictable consequences.

3. Investigate quiet tendencies: Often people are just introverted, or naturally quiet. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this. However, sometimes quietness, similar to lying, can be a red flag that this person has something to hide. Don't make assumptions, but be aware.

4. Screen for childish/rude/judgemental behavior: Especially in groups, this type of behavior is a strong symptom of greater danger. If someone confides in you their distaste for another person, it's not necessarily bad. But if you notice a pattern of generally immature and rude behavior that negatively affects people around them or disrupts social situations, you may be in danger.

5. Massive dramatic incidents/explosions: Major arguments in restaurants, faked pregnancies, and destroyed personal belongings are common examples of this. This is the type of behavior that you're trying to avoid by stearing clear of Danger Zoners. Usually, by the time you've spotted this symptom, it's quite clear and often too late. Even still, some people who are spell bound by hotness can convince themselves that this was a one time thing or that everyone else just doesn't understand. If you've read to this point and are still trying to justify the behavior of someone you know (or yourself), please take this quiz to find out if you too are crazy.

Q: What should I do if I think I know, or am dating someone in the Danger Zone?

A: Knowing someone and dating someone in the Danger Zone are two very different things. People can have successful friendships with the Dangerous. In fact, some of the most fun people we know reside in the Danger Zone. If you think you can maintain a pure friendship with this person and can keep yourself out of truly risky situations, enjoy their antics at arms length.

But if you're in a relationship or are dating someone who you've now determined is crazy, the situation is far more delicate. Odds are, if you know they're Dangerous, you're looking to de-escalate your relationship. Be careful! Nothing sets off a Danger Zoner like feeling that they have no control over a situation. The best case scenario is for this person to lose interest in you (allowing them to hold onto control) and leave you. You can help them lose interest in you by demonstrating unattractive behavior, but be careful not to do anything that triggers dangerous behavior, such as showing blatant disintrest, leering at other men/women, or avoiding the person completely. Being gross (farts, nose picking, etc.) and embarassing yourself in public are good ways to make yourself unattractive to most people of the opposite sex.

However, in some extreme cases, even this won't work. If the person is hopelessly devoted to you after a proper showing of lude behavior, sound the alarm! You might be in an "If I can't have you, no one will!" situation. At this point, you may be forced to fake your death. And depending just how crazy this one is, you may have to cover your tracks pretty throroughly to make sure you're really safe.